Interviewing Republicans

This just in: The White House, a couple of weeks ago, released a partial transcript of a phone call between Trump and the leader of Ukraine.

There are two things about this; one is in dispute and one is not.

First, Trump asked Ukraine to investigate Joe Biden. The president of the United States asked the leader of Ukraine to investigate Trump’s political opponent. This is not in dispute. You can read it yourself.

Secondly, it appears that Trump is asking for a favor (investigate Biden) in exchange for U.S. military assistance. The reading is fairly clear on this but if you don’t want to see it that way, there is some wiggle room.

Both of these are wrong, highly illegal and impeachable offenses.

There is a whistleblower that is also saying that Trump said what we saw he said in the transcript. In other words, we have a transcript from the White House that agrees with the whistleblower.

In response, the Republican Party defends Trump by pretending the transcript, which we call all see, does not exist and therefore, the whistleblower is the only evidence of wrongdoing. They also say that we should make the whistleblower’s name public – the exact opposite of what whistleblower legislation allows. The consensus opinion on this is that this is just witness intimidation….which is also illegal but is now supported by the entire Republican Party.

Lately, reporters have been asking Republican Congressmen if it is okay for a president, any president, to ask a foreign country for help against a political opponent. They don’t say “Trump” but just ANY president. Note: The correct answer is “That is not okay and is highly illegal.” So, there is a simple, single, correct answer.

Here is how various Republicans are answering the question: “Is it okay for any president to ask the leader of a foreign country for help against a political opponent?”

“I like poptarts”

“I just pooped myself a little.”

“Red crayons taste strawberry.”

“What’s really important is Benghazi.”

“No hablo Ingles.”

“This is really about Obama and you see that politicians when climate change hoaxes us out about China is cheating really bad but sends beautiful letters while Biden which hunt.”

“I know a kid that belongs to 5 book clubs.”

“I am outraged that the Democrat committee arranged chairs in a semi-circle instead of a straight line. How is that fair? This is an outrage!”

This is just a small sampling. I wish someone would put together a string of these and post it on Youtube. I would find it funny. Republicans would watch themselves say something and then turn to whoever was watching with them and say, “I didn’t say what you just saw me say.”

Time to save the world.

Up, up and away…

Jim