Potty-gate

This just in: Trump is panicking about impeachment.

The facts are not in dispute. That he used his office for personal gain is not in dispute. That he held up badly needed military funds from Ukraine in an effort to extort personal favors is not in dispute. That he ordered those in his immediate circle to not testify or provide information to Congress as a way to obstruct the process is not in dispute.

What is in dispute is…why are the chairs arranged this way?

In other words, the defense of Trump has nothing to provide showing his innocence so Republicans have resorted to the Chewbacca Defense.

Now, in an effort to distract, Trump has taken to discussing low water pressure in bathrooms. He actually took the time to tell us how people can’t get enough water to wash their hands. He even said, at a presidential round table, on television, that people are now having to flush their toilets 10 or even 15 times. Here is the video…

What you missed was how the conversation continued after the video was over. I wasn’t there so this should be considered paraphrased and second hand:

Reporter: Maybe you have to flush so much because your poops are big.

Trump: My poops are the biggest. No other president has taken poops as big as mine. Many people have said so. In fact, the press, I call them the fake news media, has under-reported the size of my poops. It’s all a hoax.

It went downhill from there.

Time to save the world.

Up, up and away…

Jim